There are many people on WordPress who have few followers, so few they can keep track of how many comments they have compared to how many page views they’ve received. It seems there are a few dissatisfied customers out there in InterZone who get a bit pissy when they get “liked” but not read.
I know this because I’ve read their complainsts…as if they’re being robbed somehow. Good gosh, people…I just wrote a post that got 28 views so far and only eleven “likes.” That’s nearing a 67% rejection rate…67% ! ! !
I wouldn’t have even noticed unless I had seen these whiney posts before, criticizing social media surfers for “liking” pages without reading them…as if they had posted a Nobel Prize winning blog post and it had been slighted by fickle viewers desperate for a gratuitous return “like” as repayment.
Twenty-eight views with only eleven likes…take that, whiners. I’ll give them all to you, para gratis.
The humble service I provide writing a post that draws people’s attention, and then leaves them with the sour taste of not being properly entertained is more satisfying than 100 or 200 or 300 “likes” from people who feel obligated because, “…everybody else is liking it, so it’s got to be good…” or “…this so-called human has been posting for 23 years, and they’ve gotten 142 likes in eighteen minutes – If I ‘like’ them maybe they’ll ‘like’ me too…” click. Que milagro !
In a world of miracles, Que Mi-la-gro !
“Somebody shoot me while I’m happy, ” Fats Waller used to yell out when he was hitting his stride playing some of the most wicked boogie-woogie piano ever heard on this planet, or any other, I’m sure. Why no Nobel Prize for Musical Mayhem, Fats? Loser….
I just received a letter…and in a beach town in Costa Rica, that’s a miracle. And, guess what…there are estimators and judges of true miracles at work here…I have been nominated for the first Nobel Prize in Blogosphere Literature.
Yes, my name will soon be mentioned along with the giants…the innovators of humankind…the pioneers who were spurned and denigrated. (Not that I’ve been spurned or denigrated…I really am that literry light who got 142 “likes” in eighteen minutes…I just felt a bit embarrassed).
I’m thinking my portrait will fit right in with the other winners of Nobel Prizes…especially the Nobel Peace Prize, set up by the guy who invented dynamite…yeah, Alfred Nobel invented dynamite…putting that in my next blog, while I’m standing on the shoulders of giants, as Sir Isaac Newton said. I am a humble human being though, and I have no foothold on the Newts giant shoulders.
I dined on bad pizza tonight, in a land of fresh vegetables and miracle fruits…yeah…make your own punch-lines.
“Hold on to your hats,” as Bette Davis said in “All About Eve” because sweet ioniamartin just “liked” my last post…she might even leave a kind, patronizing comment. I do know she secretly hates me and my meteoric rise to the top of the blogging world, so she’s skewed my previous calculations on purpose.
But that kind of pandering is not going to sway the Nobel Prize judges. They only award these valued chunks of metal to unknowns, branded lunatics, shut-in charlatans, and untelligible fools…and I’m not going to lower the tone of this prize, no matter what ioniamartin has to say about me or my mad ramblings.
I deserve my just rewards…and a free trip to Scaninavia, home of my Viking, Dyamite Developing ancestors…so give in, and give it up.